- HEADLINES: Company Encounters Two Hackers near Portsmouth
- EDITORIAL “I realized Shotbow has one of the worst intellectual genepools in a Minecraft community, and that’s saying a lot.”
- TRADE US MineZ Trade Run
- PvP Drill 34th Mass PvP Event - I forgot. Someone who was there write it out.
- DOMESTIC Drills Re-enforced order was actually reinforced
- DOMESTIC Iron Axes becomes new Merchandise
- ORDERS: *
CONTENTS : CTRL+F and type in the following if you just want to read a small part of the news.
PORTSMOUTH, S.L.- It was a walk in the park, really. Except GreyWolf64. He can use the “IT’S LAG” excuse, but come on… I didn’t hear from anyone about him DOING ANYTHING AT ALL that was noteworthy.
Irishkaiser - Outside of the UTC, there seems to be little to be found of sophistication, culture and creativity. Holy shit, my recent interactions and encounters with players these past months, specifically ones that have tried to join the us or have already joined us have made me realize that Shotbow’s community is filled with a bunch of ignorant, soft ninnies who base their actions on feelings and emotions. They are easily dazzled, can hardly think for themselves and prefer the path of public acceptance rather than virtuous truth. The one that takes the cake was Sollux, ESPECIALLY SOLLUX… Of course there was Sam_F and his… Hippie bullshit, but his was very tame and easily blended with the usual crap Shotbow spouts.
BUT SOLLUX… HOW COULD WE ACTUALLY LET A GUY THAT SAID THIS
[2:25:19 PM | Edited 2:25:20 PM] Z-Lan ♊: opinions cant be false joe**
[2:25:23 PM] Капитан Жалёо(Irishkaiser): WHAT? CAN’T OPERATE IN AN ENVIRONMENT OF FREE SPEECH?
[2:25:28 PM] Капитан Жалёо(Irishkaiser): ALL OPINIONS ARE TRUE
[2:25:34 PM] Капитан Жалёо(Irishkaiser): I GUESS I SHOULD GAS ALL THE AMERICANS
[2:25:36 PM] Z-Lan ♊: the whole point of an opinion is that it cant be proven false or true
[2:25:39 PM] Капитан Жалёо(Irishkaiser): IT"S JUST AN OPINION
[2:25:44 PM] Капитан Жалёо(Irishkaiser): Yes it can
[2:25:46 PM] Капитан Жалёо(Irishkaiser): That’s how opinions CHANGE
[2:25:47 PM] Joseph McGeoghegan: Yeah it can
[2:25:53 PM] Капитан Жалёо(Irishkaiser): THAT’S HOW YOU CHANGE OPINIONS
[2:25:56 PM] ArgoArcher (FiyaTaco) ♡: >when you American and you just standing watching the rest of then act like fucktards
… Get in undetected? Now, there’s nothing wrong with whatever he believes in, even though he’s wrong… But the fact is, the intellectual landscape of the UTC based on reason, truth and logic may be under threat from the “MY FEELINGS” Academy of Bullshit from the large influx of dumbasses. I would say more, but then I would explain to you about how this guy started talking like he was in some sort of anime where 16 year old kids save the world through the power of friendship. He will suffer in the long run.
The Directory proudly announces that it delivered:
3 Chain Sets
2 Infinity Bows
4 Iron Swords
2 Iron Axes
In value exchange for
22 Health Potions
Another eventful trade run, but this time it demonstrated our strengths in discipline and prowess in battle, which was different from the last time where we were very lax. This trade run also marked the first time we’ve sold Iron Axes which so far have been popular to the Southerners. Two hackers that attacked four times in total were held off and soundly defeated and banned, with the only casualty being GreyWolf64 but whose stuff we successfully recovered.
The Trade Run has seen a change in our traditional enemy’s(butt ugly premiums) tactics with Gun theorizing that they do not go for the strongest - rather they go for the players furthest away from the group after noticing that they were picking off customers one by one.
The Trade Run continued until Romero where we sold out after quite awhile, waiting for the last person to sell stuff to.
Team Let’s Get this Over With
Minecraftepic47(First and second rounds)
Team Bootcamp Graduates
Team Let’s Get This Over With started as the attackers in Stillwater Motte and Bootcamp Graduates as the Defenders. Initially, Team Let’s Get This Over With gained the upperhand by successfully dividing the two teams - however - the newly trained Bootcamp Graduates(FinnMNMiner, Missingnose) who were recently taught how to fight in Irishkaiser’s Academy of Fine Swearing and Brawling actually performed better than expected and held a valiant holding action. GunOverdose was initially singled out and was about to be finished before a cry of help from Minecraftepic47 forced them to regroup.
Minecraftepic47, who sucked at communication(unused to Push to Talk) - made the group idle about wondering where the fuck he was but confident of just taking out the rest. GunOverdose regrouped with his teammates with better communication and they managed to kill Minecraftepic47 just as reinforcements arrived. A battle resumed with Missing being killed and… I don’t know what happened to Benergy, it’s like he just died or something. Leaving the survivors as Finn and GunOverdose.
Team Let’s Get This Over With started as defenders and patrolled around Stillwater, finding Bootcamp Graduates inside Stillwater itself, a blitz of a fight occurred involving the deaths of nearly every group member except Minecraftepic47 and FinnMNMiner. The latter won with a simple grenade throw that killed Minecraftepic.
In Arbreton Bridge, the two teams prepared for a charge forward with some replacements to each team because Minecraftepic47 said he had to go soon since Round 2. The teams charged and though it seemed Team Let’s Get This Over With was about to unleash a counter-attack - Jubbah’s noobiness and lack of experience of coordinating quickly made him die as the group struggled to get Jubbah together with the group. Jubbah’s death forced a quick fight over his loot items with Missing the only casualty to Bootcamp Graduates. No losses to Team Bootcamp Graduates.
This drill has showcased how far training has progressed for specific members such as Missing and FinnMNMiner who fought like retards when they were first in the UTC, but has dramatically improved. Even Missing after just one training session managed to make himself useful by allowing him to be placed in holding actions.
Jubbah however sucked balls. Like, he really does. He sucks. Sollux doesn’t even fucking know what the fuck we were doing. Fuck him.
You guys are all going to pay for sending me shit members.
They are beloved by all.
1) Trade Run completed. SOP
2) US Trade Run next week.
^THE ^[?] ^EMPIRE, ^THE ^COMPANY’S ^OFFICIAL ^NEWS ^SOURCE ^AND ^PROPAGANDA ^TOOL. ^AW ^YEAH