- HEADLINES: Race Riots in Aspermont as Banjo Week opening ceremony progresses
- EDITORIAL The Dawn of VR Gaming
- TRADE archive compileNewList.sh data.json head.html links.html output.md tail.html US MineZ Trade Run
- TRADE archive compileNewList.sh data.json head.html links.html output.md tail.html US MineZ Trade
- PvP Drill archive compileNewList.sh data.json head.html links.html output.md tail.html 58th Mass PvP Event - Wait for Gun’s Report.
- DOMESTIC UTC Colonial Actions in the Midlands.
- DOMESTIC The Secret UTC Build Area in Aspermont Publicly Revealed
- DOMESTIC 111th Special Provision Compagni par le sang verse.
- DOMESTIC 111th gains new members
- DOMESTIC Banjo Week begins this week.
- DOMESTIC iamnottroy hired for Piano Playing skills
- ORDERS: *
FROSTBAIN, M.L.- Race riots erupted in Aspermont yesterday as anger over concern for the city’s racial purity became an issue. The bureau of immigration was sacked the following day as the amount of premiums in Aspermont became too damn high. The Aspermont Militia said it handled the premiums well, but was worked side by side with Right Wing Death Squads to keep the premiums in line.
“Most premiums were mostly tourists”, according to the bureau of immigration before they were executed for treason by the Directory as they corrected “It should be ALL premiums are ALL tourists”.
This Banjo Week has been mostly successful as well, with many coming, 0% crime and of course blue and white fireworks were deployed for the first time. Some premiums have gotten legal paperworks such as iamnottroy whose piano playing skills have gotten him hired.
The Guest list included
(ALL FOUR DIRECTORY MEMBERS)
Some other guys
Irishkaiser - VR Gaming has laid root to the foundations of future mil-sims which in the future may create mass produced soldiers. While it may seem like a video game that doesn’t apply to real life, people forget that if people run these simulations millions of times, patterns appear which will be a bounty for defense analysts to study.
The desensitization and eventual mass spreading of combat military skills such as proper aiming, firing and positioning(if the games themselves get advanced far enough) will now allow for massive amounts of people to acquire some kind of pre-combat experience before handling real world projectile weapons. Through virtual drilling, you can give a person the ability to expect what to happen in combat as they were trained in a mostly competitive environment that involved a kill or be killed mentality.
Would this not make it easier to drill people to kill? I certainly would love to get my recruits get used to the “idea” of a firefight. Plus, it’s less expensive this way.
The Directory proudly announces that there is no trade run due to celebrating Banjo Week.
The Directory proudly announces that it has delivered
1 Diamond Sword
in value exchange for
3 Health Potions
1 Golden Apple
Random schmuck wanted to trade just because.
It’s at Sunday 9PM
Teams: Lone Gun-GunOverdose
New Bloods- Derussiander and Meme_MC
White Diversity- Mr_pi and _Silver
It was a 1v2v2 set up where points were awarded based on kills, and an additional point for surviving.
ROUND 1- Victory to White Diversity Round started off with GunOverdose in the castle and the teams of two opposite of each other. When the round began the new bloods were first to charge in. Gun held them off and retreated. Another charge was done by White Diversity who forced Gun out of the castle and out into the open. After Gun was forced out, bow battles and swift strikes were dealt to each other but no kills. Then the battle began to ensue along the riverbed between all teams. Meme_MC was shot by Gun because he was caught in the river between both teams, Gun was shot by Pi after attempting to loot for food. Derussiander was chased down and finished off in the castle.
White Diversity: 3
Lone Gun: 1
New Bloods: 0
ROUND 2- Victory to White Diversity. Same style but at Yongton Abbey. When the fight began, everyone ran for the mountains. The New Bloods got their first to prevent any tactical advantages for Gun, and bow battles ensued. Eventually everyone split off from each other. A 2v2 in bows began for White Diversity and New Bloods after they came down the mountain. Gun positioned himself on top of the mountain to prevent any retreats. White Diversity backed off, in hopes Gun and New bloods would kill each other. New bloods attempted to take the mountain but Derussiander got “THIS IS SPARTA”’d off the mountain and died. Meme could not persue due to lack of food (Mr_Pi only gave us three bread in the kits… WHO CARRIES ONLY THREE BREAD?!). Eventually White Diversity managed to find and kill the survivors after their resources drained.
White Diversity: 6
Lone Gun: 2
New Bloods: 0
ROUND 3- Victory to Lone Gun.
Battle took place at McIovinville.Gun realized he was sandwiched between both sides completely in “death alley” (the bridge) decided to make a distraction of a giant penis in hopes it would by him time. When the round began, both teams of two were hesitant to come in allowing Gun to get out of the fray. Must’ve been because of the distraction :V. Eventually the teams of two fought each on the bridge. It became 2 1v1’s. HOWEVER, because of the grenades thrown Gun tracked them down. Mr_Pi and _Silver were killed and immediately after (timing couldn’t have been any more perfect) Gun swooped in after Derussiander. Gun chasing him literally punched Meme_MC who exploded violently with loot. It became a 1 on 1 with Gun victorious.
White Diversity: 6
Lone Gun: 5
New Bloods: 2
ROUND 4: White Diversity victorious. Battle was at sanctuary this time. The New bloods charged in after Gun who was stationed in the church. Gun escaped only to find White Diversity lurking outside. New bloods got separated and Meme_MC died. Long battle ensued between everyone. Eventually Lone Gun and Derussiander were depleted and went back to Meme’s body to loot it. They fought each other to the point where the both players couldn’t sprint because of lack of food. Derussiander killed Gun after 15 or so minutes (wasn’t counting just took fucking forever). Derussiander starved to death.
White Diversity: 8
Lone Gun: 5
New Bloods: 3
No major encounters between the Company and bandits this week. All Quiet on the Eastern Front.
The secret UTC-inspired build by Majicou, Robertthegoat and Anskar was made public by the Company yesterday. Irishkaiser commented to install gas chambers down there instead to trick premiums into.
[The Misfit Regimentals were proclaimed by the Directory to not automatically be Imperial Citizens upon joining and may be killed on sight and or kill in return unless they’re on a mission with the UTC.] (https://www.reddit.com/r/UnknownTradeCo/comments/50yr0m/111th_frostbain_regiments_special_provision/)
Consequently if you find them alone in the woods or something, you may kill them if you feel like it and they likewise.
They will either pay the court a fine or serve their sentence.
Tell us, what do you think you’re going to be doing this Banjo Week?
We can afford such luxuries.
1) Banjo Week completed. Have fun. That’s an order.
2) Refill Powder if you can plzkthx
3) Move our alts back to their posts.
^THE ^[?] ^EMPIRE, ^THE ^COMPANY’S ^OFFICIAL ^NEWS ^SOURCE ^AND ^PROPAGANDA ^TOOL. ^AW ^YEAH.