HEADLINES: FART DAY AND BANJO WEEK CELEBRATED INDOORS.
ASPERMONT, WESTERLANDS- With Irishkaiser’s router being broken until about Wednesday this week, many UTC decided to spend Banjo Week indoors because faggots like GunOverdose was doing his stupid ass super secret ag-. Nothing. Nothing… Move along.
Anyway, Gun was mysteriously unavailable like Perry the Platypus or some shit, leaving a regimental and a Company Member to lead celebrating Banjo Week… By one, being a bandit and just making Frostbain his hunting grounds… And then the regimental decided to go play Arcade Games with the rest of the UTC.
So one guy went camping and another decided to go play vidya gaymen with the rest. Oh well, I guess this is a modernizing society. We 2010 now.
Well, at least I was able to join a dungeon run earlier. Haven’t been able to in a long while.
EDITORIAL - MORE’S THE PITY
Irishkaiser - It was pity that stayed Bilbo’s hand when he was given the choice to kill Gollum. My experience recently has been rather… Similar. Instead of worrying about them and letting them dictate my happiness with their existence, I’ve come to realize that blinds me from the truth of my situation in which I should be very grateful for the circumstances I grew up in. We are generally a poorer nation but poverty and suffering builds character and I’ve grown up empathizing with suffering and being around people who take on suffering with a smile because they’re used to it. On my course on the internet, I’ve met some good, some bad… And then there were the completely horrendous ones. Not just MineZ alone, I assure you.
But it was in MineZ that I decided to take things further and… Well… Let’s not get into that. But in there, I’ve seen just how my enemies are miserable in themselves. Killing them would simply put them out of their misery. As Hornblower once said: “They’re not worth the powder”. Their lives are based around cheap laughs and facades. Revisiting an older community, I’ve come across one of my old enemies. Younger me thought it would be worth getting in his way so he’d stop fucking with others. But lo and behold look what I discovered. A sad individual, who always bragged about his Sweden’s glorious social security net and how it was a much better place overall… Rather he was a sad bastard and this is what he wrote.
Victory Today at 5:00 PM
Hey guys. Long time no see. Things have been kind of rough on my end, hence my silence. Long and depressing story short, I completely gave up on life after a long and fruitless fight with clinical depression. After a failed suicide attempt, I lost my apartment and was only spared living on the street due to a forced vacation to a mental hospital under supervision to prevent further attempts on my life. That was 3 months ago now, and I'm going to be discharged any day now. I've starting to climb back out of that place, even found a new apartment, but I don't have the money for the down payment. I resent asking for help, but I'm out of alternatives. The down payment is $600; if anyone has the means to help, and can afford to spare a dollar or two, then my PayPal is . I'm reaching out because I need this new attempt at life to stick. If I slip back down, I don't think I'll come back out again. Thanks for reading this far, and sorry for the dead man's grip presentation. Kind of comes with the territory unfortunately.
And I felt a sort of satisfaction hearing this from him. Especially with how he drove away and treated certain people with indignity. Let life deal with them for they cannot deal with themselves.
TRADE - US MineZ Trade Run
The Directory proudly announces that it has cancelled the Trade Run for Banjo Week.
PvP Drill 143rd Mass PvP Event - NON? NON.
Everyone’s indoor playing video games.
DOMESTIC - FART DAY IMMEDIATELY CELEBRATED AFTER BANJO WEEK
Fartday, a day of centering around the 95th Regiment and its descendants was celebrated immediately by members of the 1st Regiment and the rest of the UTC by reminding them of what the 95th had done…
Let’s see… Scouts. Scouts were pioneered by the 95th… Then I guess factories are considered 95th… There’s also being there. That’s 95th too. Lots of things 95th. Christopher Columbus was black. Shakespear was black. You know.
May I remind you that Fartabstract’s birthday was on September 11th, 2002? Thousands of dead American souls commemorate the birthday of one our leading members. Upon stalking Fart’s hot-ass brother, Irishkaiser unfortunately found his facebook profile un-updated. It was sad.
DOMESTIC - BANJO WEEK FOOD FESTIVAL PARADE.
DOMESTIC - MEMORIAL PLAQUE INAUGURATED THIS BANJO WEEK.
Fuck whatever, just follow the coordinates I gave you and go pay your respects by throwing a potion at it or something. Fuck I don’t know, I was supposed to lead the inauguration but router le broke.
FINANCE - INFLATION AND NEW TAXES SLOWS DOWN PHILIPPINE ECONOMIC GROWTH.
A hit was taken by the Clan Bank this week as inflation and new taxes slowed down the Philippine Economic Growth, giving the financial markets a shock therapy to re-adjust and re-align its current finances. Boomer Captains have projected that it would take 6 months to stabilize at worst.
However, after all of this, the end of the week saw an opening of a good rehabilitation from VUL and PRMX with GSMI still going up.
It seems that the only major companies that were affected are majorly foreign companies as the new taxes were intended to curb dependencies on foreign sources and instead build up local sources and industries. Still, foreign imports and foreign companies are a huge part of the Philippine economy and any changes are bound to have some bad effects since people are “used” to the current structure now.
Good news is the projected shakeup will only last for six months at least. Lahayamm.
1) Special Trade Run This Week.
^(THE [?] EMPIRE,THE COMPANY’S OFFICIAL NEWS SOURCE AND PROPAGANDA TOOL. AW YEAH)