HEADLINES: REFORMS BEGAN LAST WEEK
ASPERMONT, WESTERLANDS - The Home Office authorized reforms in the UNKNOWN [?] Trading Company after discussions as to its inefficiency in sectors
The top of the agenda for the past few weeks was the dilapidated state of the 93rd Regiment of Virtues and how it functioned more like a refugee camp than a Regiment of the Line in service to the UNKNOWN [?] Trading Company. The Regiment promised to be far more stricter in its standards and begun to try to apply them last week.
The rest of the UNKNOWN [?] Trading Company however seemed fine but weren’t synergized properly or praised or awarded enough, so new pedestals and idols were raised in order to show people the ideal, such as the ceremonial re-raising of the 29th Regiment of Whitehaven to honour a Company Veteran’s services that has shamefully done more in a week than a regiment has done in an entire year.
Trade runs were on the agenda which is manned by Imperial Citizens, the 1st and currently 29th regiments but Irishkaiser argued against incentives to go to trade runs, referring to that method as “bribery”. Irishkaiser insisted that the national character is the root cause and that if we have the correct the type of people rather than correcting people, it matters not if there is a reward for going to trade runs as those with the essence of duty will know the right thing to do anyway. That they can think for themselves as an independent, intelligent human being is better than babysitting and ordering people to “volunteer” for something that requires volunteers.
Irishkaiser also hoped to reintroduce the hard-hitting, hard-taking, stoic warrior-culture of the Company Veterans that played this game as Irishkaiser felt that everything was getting too politically correct and duplicitous.
ESPERA: You see reporter, no outsider can understand how we really are.
CHAFFIN: We’re all fuckin brothers.
ESPERA: And we’re all fuckin alpha males too.
CHAFFIN: We gotta constantly test each other.
ESPERA: All we do is fight for position in the pack, dawg. All that training we do? The martial arts, the grappling? It’s for practice but it’s also for real; to achieve dominance over a motherfucker, we do the same thing mentally. It’s prison rules, dawg. We probe for any fucking weakness we can find: family, race, brains, looks. Anything you have on a motherfucker you wear it the fuck out.
CHAFFIN: Being a marine ain’t about words anyway - it’s about your fucking actions.
ESPERA: Back home in the civilian world, a fool slapped a “protect the planet” sticker on his car suddenly he’s all about the environment and shit, don’t matter that he still drives that fucking car fires up his computer and video games and cellphone every night with electricity made from nuclear power, coal and fucking melted baby seal oil, nuh-huh I got a DEKRA sticker on my shit so I’m all about saving the fucking planet.
In the fuckin Marine Corps civilization, it don’t matter what a motherfucker says. The only thing that matters is, dawg, when you charge that motherfucking machinegun when the motherfucker tells you to, you charge that motherfucking machinegun.
CHAFFIN: Shit everybody in this platoon’s a hard charger. Marines bitch about everything, man. Chow; fucking moron officers; no time for a combat jack but you will never hear a marine in this platoon bitch that we could die at any second. That’s what we signed up for.
ESPERA: Oorah that, motherfucker.
CHAFFIN: [Do you think I] fucking care some latte-sipping bisexual college student reading about Justin Timberlake of Rolling Stones think I’m a psycho racist cracker? Fuck no. I’d give my life for any brother in here I know any one of them would do the same for me. You think it matters if I call fucking T a nigger? I fucking love that big dark green marine and his big old beautiful nigger dick. I love all my dirty spic brothers here.
ESPERA: And I love this fuckin cracker-ass inbred racist peckerwood fuck. I don’t know why I do, dawg, but I do…
To help with guiding the principles of these reforms, a new book is being commissioned to explain the type of people the Company should want, the type of people the Company should ignore, their history and their peculiar traits. All to be reviewed by Shirvan.
EDITORIAL - The Rational Optimist by Matt Ridley, Review
Shirvan from Caspian Report - People who say that the world is gonna end or something are stupid when the numbers say the opposite is true
TRADE - US MineZ Trade Run
The Directory proudly announces that it has delivered
1 Iron Armor Set
1 Iron Sword
1 Diamond Sword
2 Infinity Bows
in value exchange for
Commonwealth items resold in the Trade Run kek. This trade run encountered multiple people, up to about seven individuals in total(large for today’s terms I know). Some of whom were strangely geared. Encountering a lone full armored player, the caravan attempted to initiate dialogue in which the response of the player was to stay quiet and move about aggressively. The caravan members then advised that they should drop the iron player but the rules of engagement states that the UNKNOWN [?] Trading Company shouldn’t fire first on unconfirmed targets.
Yadda yadda yadda. Met one nice guy in a PM though.
Also, the Commonwealth provided the stuff here sold in trade runs. The only thing that was UTC was the diamond sword. Looks like we have factories in China now, eh?
TRADE - Common Market Trade
The Directory proudly announces that it has witnessed the following goods circulated.
Regular Health Potions
Power II Bows
Yeah the cobwebs were for the giant hunting part of the Commonwealth Games.
PvP Drill 148th Mass PvP Event - STAND ALONE GIANTS. TWO VERSUS ONE.
Taking place in the Gravels, two teams: Cymru/Wales and Gold Armor/Champions were supposed to come, but the latter decided not to in the end, forfeiting their claim and bringing the Gold Medal to Cymru/Wales.
Since not much action happened other than logging and checking the zone, I’ll just write about the argument that happened soonafter by two individuals from The Old Guard and one from Gold Armor/Champions against one initially one Welshman who was later joined by five people from the other teams, two of which came from Gold/Armor Champions.
One member of the Old Guard and one from Gold Armor/Champions opposed the decision and insisted they reschedule, using political scare tactics by accusing that the person who was running the event in the first place was in the same team that won by default accusing them of cheating. The two insisted on using the words “executive decision” and abuse when all they did was follow the rules and met the requirements.
In addition to their complaints about the “arbitrary” decisions, the two claimed they had real life matters to attend to which prevented them from joining.
In the Welshman’s ensuing defense, the Welshman claimed that to reschedule would be to punish the people who actually put the time, effort and sacrificed to be there, noting that the winners were from time schedules that were awkward such as Western Europe and the Philippine Islands and that they simply had disciplined themselves better and structured and scheduled their lives, should we punish them for that? The Welshman reasoned.
The Welshman also said that he had asked each and everyone in that room if they were available for that time every Sunday at which both admitted that they would be most likely available and joined based on their own intelligence that they gave themselves. The Champion said he was only available in some days and that is why he joined a team, to be represented.
The Welshman also stated that even so, he was given the power by the same people who are arguing against him, because nobody wanted to do the hard work of thinking these things through as everytime he set up a discussion, nobody had any good ideas to input and so it was left to the Welshman to figure things out.
The Old Guard and Gold Armor Champions later insisted that the last one was rescheduled, but that was the only actual executive decision made and was tolerated by the others because it appealed to them and served only their interests. It was at this point that the first one to provide evidence as to the status of the Gold Armor/Champions from the Champions themselves broke ranks and told them that he could have joined but he just didn’t want to.
Champion Today at 6:01 AM i mean i could have came if i wanted to
Champion Today at 6:02 AM i just didn’t really feel like it and wanted to finish my laundry and shit
The admittance of the Gold Armor/Champion representative made the argument of “real life issues” moot when the player in question who represented their team just decided not to.
Later, other people came on to support the Welshman when the discussion was made public, using biased words and political scare tactics to sway the argument, but this was a critical point that destroyed their argument when people actually analyzed the situation.
One member of Triple J, who takes part in certain sports activities that are laddered into tournaments stated:
Today at 6:33 AM Yes, as they participated. Today at 6:36 AM I don’t get why you’d want to punish his team for actually participating. Today at 6:42 AM A tournament doesn’t stop because one coach didn’t make the bus trip. They’re DQ’d from the tournament and you play the rest of the teams like you would have. Not participating is losing.
And another from Gold Armor Champions based his opinion on the fact that his team did forfeit by choice.
Today at 6:39 AM I mean we really could have come to the event But I have a few ideas on how we could redesign the event for next year so we don’t run into this problem
A spectator gave his input later
Today at 9:07 AM So I wasn’t there, but yeah, no Rescheduling would be dumb and self-serving, you guys could have made it but you just chose to blow it off
A final one from Triple J came in from the flanks to rescue the beleaguered Welshman turning a landslide majority decision to the Welshman
Today at 12:46 PM I’m with [Team Mate] on this one
The Old Guard Armor Champions later attempted to maneuver using the precedent of being awarded a medal, but this was the final blow as the Gold Armor/Champion FUCKED UP HIS MEMORY AND THEN EMBARRASSED HIMSELF OUT OF HIS CREDIBILITY.
In the past of the Dungeon, the event leader recognized that the Gold Armor/Champion TRIED REALLY HARD to get into that event and he did but was unfortunately the last minute had to go. The others recognized this and gave him a medal for participating anyway.
However, in the story retold by the Gold Armor/Champion he claimed he was part of the event. However, two witnesses stated that the Champion was never there when the event happened, causing the Old Guardsman to question even his own buddy and thus ruin any political group credibility and rendering all their scare tactics moot.
The Gold Armor/Champion later dropped his claim and the Welshman, battered by abuse stood there and then proceeded to ungentlemanly rub it in the Old Guardsman’s face, calling him a socialist and a cuck while laughing and masturbating to the sweet sweet victory.
He came so much that night… So… Much… Cum…
DOMESTIC - RECCE OPERATIONS DEEMED VITAL DUE TO LACK OF MINEZ WIKI
Recon and documentation attempts by the UNKNOWN [?] Trading Company are deemed important increasingly after the announcement of a NEW Shotbow wiki that will replace the unupdated and obsolete old Shotbow wiki. Areas of traffic, item distribution and new realistic political grounds will be explored by members.
Vital intel was returned these past two weeks concerning other activities of importance of MineZ that helps the UTC operate.
The Directory is considering of using this to replace War Games as there is currently a huge demand for information.
DOMESTIC - Leaderboards for the Games.
FINANCE - SPYWARE OFFERS OPENING TO SINGAPORE MARKET TURNED DOWN
St.Veracity turned down the offer by Spyware to open an account on the Singaporean Stock Exchange claiming:
Don't know and no need. Same shit.
1) TRADE RUN/RECCE? NEXT WEEK
THE [?] EMPIRE,THE COMPANY’S OFFICIAL NEWS SOURCE AND PROPAGANDA TOOL. AW YEAH
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