HEADLINES: LOCAL OLD MAN WINS WAGER AND NOW DEMANDS DEATH OF RIGHT HONOURABLE
ASPERMONT, WESTERLANDS - Local Old Man called for a Company Member’s death last week as he won a wager based on a debate about what legally constituted as a day in the Ethnic Cleansing Act, citing the Right Honourable’s statement:
Last Sunday at 3:13 PM
“I would bet my life that we agreed that it was 24 hours. I’m not even gonna check because I’m so confident”
After demonstrating that it was not only stated but even accepted that it was 18 hours by historic posts, the local old man then hounded the Company Member with his promise and demanded for his immediate suicide. Local authorities detained the old man who was attempting to break into the Right Honourable’s home to plant what was suspected as military-grade explosives.
The Company Member stated that he didn’t say he BET his life, but rather that he WOULD, in which case he didn’t. Local Old Man could not be reached for comment as he was thrown into the Asylum for Mentally Insane/Overreacting AnCaps.
EDITORIAL - Tip of My Tongue
Irishkaiser - Ya’ll niggas know what sucks, when you’ve thought about three different kinds of editorials to write last week but when you’re writing it right now, you just forget. Three. THREE different topics based on economy, game design and or philosophy but where are they when I need them? Gone. Just like asking for scouts and you got one retard who comes in full iron and insists on being full iron.
Fuck this gay earth. Nothing can ever be right. Damn, I’m angry. So close, yet so far.
There is no hope. The end times are here. What, you’re still here? I just told you that I forgot all three of my editorials, so I’m just going to ramble off of this instead. Anyway, wanna buy my stuff? Super cheap. Ever had 9 Splash IIs and 1 Golden Apple all for a button? Yes? No? Maybe? Oh those are Commonwealth prices. It’s TWO buttons for everyone else.
Man, I’m hungry.
TRADE - US MineZ Trade Run
The Directory proudly announces that it has delivered
1 Iron Armor Set
1 Iron Sword
in value exchange for
The longest trade run because we struggled to move with Shotbow’s life problems.
TRADE - Common Market Trade
The Directory proudly announces that it has witnessed the following goods circulated.
Splash II Potions
Iron Armor Pieces
Drink II Potion
Hip hip hoozay. Common Market soiree.
PvP Drill 157th Mass PvP Event - People trying to Emulate Crusades
Oh why is it fashionable when I do it? Huh? HUH!? Ya’ll niggas fucking suck, you know that. I’m Hipster Kaiser, now I can’t do Crusades cause ya’ll doing it now. Fuck this, I’m gonna go fishing in MineZ.
DOMESTIC - UNKNOWN [?] TRADING COMPANY MOST ACTIVE AND EXPANDING
The UNKNOWN [?] Trading Company and her constituent communities are not only active but also grew last week as other clans were hit hard by recent series of events. Trust
FINANCE - THINKING OF DOUBLING OUR BUDGET NEXT YEAR
What’s another 200USD+.
FINANCE - HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE UMBAKA?
1) TRADE RUN NEXT WEEK
THE [?] EMPIRE,THE COMPANY’S OFFICIAL NEWS SOURCE AND PROPAGANDA TOOL. AW YEAH