HEADLINES: NEW INDUSTRIES ACQUIRES OUTSIDE INTEREST

ASPERMONT, WESTERLANDS - Certain outside skillsets were interested in UNKNOWN [?] Trading Company endeavors last week, resulting in an exchange of products and projects, showing that the New Industries could have a chance of indeed growing further as a mutually beneficial exchange of ideas may help fuel and feed the Company’s economy.

The deal was so good, Director Irishkaiser thought they were literally working for free because the benefits to the UTC were major compared to the benefits the outsiders got instead, but still considered it worth it.

___

EDITORIAL - Diction.　　

Irishkaiser - Look I got a flight to prepare. But you ever noticed the way I talk compared to other people, using outdated references and slang terms. Nobody in this day and age uses the word “dawg”. In fact, it’s associated with late 90s-early 2000s.

I do not use “oof”, I do not use “imagine thinking” or even the dreaded “chill”. My diction doesn’t like to use those words because that to me sounds a bit submissive, ignorant and downright… Depressed. Which begs the question. What does my diction sound like to others? I’m not really sure since I can’t speak to others but to me, this is what I sound like when I analyze it.

Brother/Brotha - originating from the familial term, popularized by the African American community’s references to each other and especially in Jive Speak. Depending on context, it is a substitute for friend. Can be used to refer to persons in disagreements since brother sounds like you’re on the same team regardless.

Dawg - the use of this word is to refer to another that I have a positive affiliation with in the context. The way the word is formed however makes it sound confident and uplifting. I raise another person’s stature by simply using this word on them. The fact that a lot of people stopped using “dawg” gives this more value by scarcity.

Fuckin' A - shortened term for “aced” or “ace” boosted with “Fucking”, which is a byword for anything exceptional. To me, this word sounds as explained - exceptional. Rarely given also gives it more value via scarcity.

Assmaster Disaster - Completely original. Originally called boonut something to this effect. It sounds great because it rhymes.

Word - Agreement with what was said. It is quick so you can have that “period” effect when in conversation. Can end it there or transition to something else. The way this word sounds is excellent because it’s non-committal meaning you can agree without putting your reputation at stake for it.

Fuck, what do I sound like?

___

TRADE - US MineZ Trade Run

The Directory proudly announces that it has delivered

Iron Armor Set

Chain Armor Set

Iron Swords

Grapples

in value exchange for

5 Buttons

The first trade run where we got to sell grapples. NEWS: NOBODY WANTS. NOBODY LIKES GRAPPLES. FUCK GRAPPLES. FUCK EM.

___

TRADE - Common Market Trade

The Directory proudly announces that it has witnessed the following goods circulated.

Iron Armor

Power II Bow

Splash Potions

Diamond Sword

Warehouse Storage

Needs more Diyamante

___

PvP Drill 170 Mass PvP Event - INTRODUCING NEW GUYS TO MINEZ PVP

He likes big butts and he cannot lie.

___

DOMESTIC - GRAPPLES FAILURE. SPEED POTIONS MAYBE

Ok, so, like speed potions. Hear me out, guys… Yes, I know it’ll probably make us a bit more vulnerable but come on.

___

FINANCE - THINKING OF HAVING A LOTTERY WHERE YOU WIN A FREE INTERNATIONAL FLIGHT TICKET OR SOME SHIT.

But then I realized the lottery is literally the stupidest method because we have so few people on average that there is no thrill.

**ORDERS:**

1) PEOPLE WANTED A TRADE RUN AGAIN THIS WEEK BUT IT’S LEISURE WEEK SO I’LL LET THEM DECIDE.

___

^(THE [?] EMPIRE,THE COMPANY’S OFFICIAL NEWS SOURCE AND PROPAGANDA TOOL. AW YEAH)