^(HEADLINES)
EDITORIAL
TRADE
DRILLS
DOMESTIC
FINANCE
ORDERS
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HEADLINES: HACKERS SPOTTED ONLINE IN MINEZ
ASPERMONT, WESTERLANDS - Known hackers made it back into MineZ with three of them reported by a Company Member online at the time. The cheating provided evidence that the accusations of the former staff member concerning:
“Players that pay a lot and are buddy-buddy with admins or even low-level staff, won’t ever see a real permanent ban. Ever. That’s common knowledge, though, and the shittiest people on Shotbow, your hardcore Obsidian Rank HCF faggots are usually first in line for administrator promotions because they’re buddy-buddy with people who make those decisions”
Are still active and in practice in the MineZ of today. How disconcerting.
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EDITORIAL - What makes the COVID19 outbreak different. Remember MERS?
Irishkaiser - The unnecessary reactions both panic and apathetic has only fueled nothing but misinformation. I’ve even heard Company Members spout some really uneducated crayon-eating Marine ass shit calling it as nothing but the “COMMON COLD”, laughing because they’re unconnected hicks living in the unconnected parts of the United States.
The reason we take COVID19 seriously or was then known as the nCoV-2019 is because it’s a new mutation without full understanding that was allowed to spread BEYOND what is considered ACCEPTABLE in this day and age, which further increases its chances of MUTATION EVEN MORE, which could turn deadly. Although it is a very rare occurrence for a virus to be both deadly and contagious as deadly viruses would quickly burn out if it killed its mode of transport and reproduction too often.
This virus attacks the lungs and destroys your lung cells, which in turn triggers your immune system to counter-attack, sometimes in the wrong manner. The most common mode of death is pneumonia and maybe suffocation, as your lungs inflame while trying to fight the foreign invaders in your body. Thus, the less oxygen is available for you to acquire, thus inflaming them even more in a self-destructive cycle of biological suicide. The liver then the kidneys are usually the first casualties from this lack of oxygen. Granted, most people who have contracted the virus have had a proper immune response, it is still a WHOPPING 3-5% who require INTENSIVE CARE(applying special life support systems to combat the effects). And that is HUUUUGE.
It is good to not panic, of course. But it is also good to take it seriously. What happens when we take viruses like these seriously? Well, remember MERS? No? BECAUSE WE TOOK IT FUCKING SERIOUSLY. That’s why it never made it big and that’s why you live peacefully ignorant of the dangers that are being contained and fought back against by many of our modern systems today.
I remember MERS since I travel frequently, I always see those airport warnings telling people about MERS and applying proper containment and control methods. Customs and officers always on the watch for MERS. There are still some MERS warning signs today in many airports even though people don’t know about them as if they’re some kind of myth or urban legend.
Unfortunately, the Chinese Communist Party did NOT take it seriously and now we all have to work twice as hard to keep it contained and controlled. That’s right, but don’t worry. Gerard just died because of the Flu, right? That is so Gerard.
We wouldn’t want to have another SARS on our hands now would we? Huh, now that I mentioned it, it was the CCP that allowed SARS to spread as well since the first country to detect it was and IS HONG KONG. That is so CCP.
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TRADE - US MineZ Trade Run The Directory proudly announces that it has delivered
2 Infinity Bows
1 Iron Sword
in value exchange for
12 Health Potions
Some Food
A heartwarming trade run wherein Regulars and whites were mostly encountered being civilized as people who didn’t even want to trade did not display hostility or fear but said they had to go out of a desire for a scheduled meeting with friends to do dungeons and what not.
A clan actually came in and heard what we were doing and decided to BUY EVERYTHING we had in a massive donation. They wanted us to give the stuff away freely to the next people we encountered. I would give a shout out to them and to their donation, but we all know that some cunts read this even though they dislike us.
That is so Regulars.
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TRADE - Common Market Trade
The Directory proudly announces that it has witnessed the following goods circulated.
Infinity Bows
Buttons
Slowly but surely.
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PvP Drill 175th Mass PvP Event - SQUAD TACTICS
Ok, comrades. Let me tell you about the squad. The squad is part of the platoon, which is part of the company. Now we hold left flank against German counter attack. Just do your job and worry about your position and your immediate squad. You are helping, da?
NOW LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT SHIT SQUAD LEADERS.
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DOMESTIC - SELFIES ACTIVIST PLANNING TO SUBMIT PROPOSAL FOR A SELFIE CHANNEL
The Selfie Activists prepare to submit their proposal, omitting the male and female separations in order to avoid any political pushback and accusations of Irishkaiser making some kind of pics farm.
The activists even state that female population is at an all time low anyway and after my terrible exposed scandal to Sunclancat, what are the chances she’s even going to post anyway. You guys are still assholes for that still by the way.
It is projected to be a bunch of dudes flexing and shit though, so it’s gonna be a bit gay and homoerotic. but in the words of our Magazine:
“There is nothing gay about one man admiring the body of another man”
Fug :D
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DOMESTIC - Europeanization of the 1st Regiment Makes Shrauger Sad
Shrauger contemplated mass suicide of Americans yesterday as Europeans make up the majority of active Westerlands Regimentals. The Eurasians cheered him on.
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FINANCE - RICH OLD MEN CONGRATULATE THEMSELVES FOR NOT PASSING BUDGET
Because of vindicated fears of what happened in the stock market these past few weeks, the budget for the year 2020 has not passed, thus we’d be unable to fund the server until the budget is granted. Any funds would have to pass through personal donations rather than the profit garnered.
As a point of principle, the Exchequers refuse to spend more on cost-sink adventures such as MineZ.
Tough financial
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FINANCE - JAPAN LOOKS CLOSE TO A RECESSION
One major country that currently has been having a shrinking economy is Japan. Managing to stagnate for more than 20 years, the Japanese economy is actually getting smaller, though quality of life and or GNP are still high, a Japanese recession may cascade into an unfortunate chain of events that can affect globally.
Once again, the Empire Newspaper would like to remind that as always, markets and economies are uncertain and we can only make educated guesses from our perception. There is no certainty, only likely or unlikely.
**ORDERS:**
1) LEISURE WEEK NEXT WEEK.
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^(THE [?] EMPIRE,THE COMPANY’S OFFICIAL NEWS SOURCE AND PROPAGANDA TOOL. AW YEAH)