^(HEADLINES)

    ^(EDITORIAL)

    ^(TRADE)

    ^(DRILLS)

    ^(DOMESTIC)

    ^(FINANCE)

    ^(ORDERS)

    ___

    HEADLINES: TWO MISSING COMPANY CITIZENS

    ASPERMONT, WESTERLANDS - Two Company Citizens were designated missing as they haven't logged on at their usual times. One of them however has stated that if he went missing, we should assume he got nabbed by the government or something. Alternatively, he did express intention to sign up in his country's military or something earlier.

    The other, just didn't log on ever since, even though we've been in good recent contact with him. Ah well, c'est la vie.

    10 Diamond Sword reward for finding our missing friends. C'est tout.

    ___

    EDITORIAL - Leave Matters of Consequence to Your Betters, Dog.  

    Irishkaiser - Day after day, the Western world continually disappoints by their obsession and fixation with things that do not matter at all. They are so transfixed by their pettiness that they rob themselves of reason and distract themselves from real issues and problems.

    I cannot go a single week anymore without seeing some nigger crying about some blatant injustice that needs to be solved when there is no injustice in the first place. What should have been a concerted effort to tackle a global pandemic instead becomes politicized for brownie points. Both pro-mask and anti-mask have radically closed their minds, forgetting that the science is a constantly changing self-correcting discipline. What's worse is that the entire Western world seems to engorge itself in this. What shouldn't matter to the Dutch or Germans, suddenly becomes the hot topic issue.

    There are real issues right now and all ya'll who crucified me for speaking out about the threat of the Chinese Coronavirus or the fact that Kneeling on Neck is an acceptable and non-lethal subjugation technique, seem to have taken the same role except in reverse. Mein Gott, move on. Nagorno-Karabakh, the Zhenhua Data Leaks and other such issues are currently the latest pressing matters.

    Or, maybe you enjoy your own anger. In which case, just get out of the way of your betters, dog. Actually, maybe it's better that you should be left in the dark about these things. Behold the future, behold the Thalmor.

    ___

    TRADE - US MineZ Trade Mission

    The proudly Directory reports that an unofficial Trade Mission delivered

    3 iron sets,

    2 iron swords,

    3 gun powder

    in exchange for

    14 Snowballs.

    A very average Trade Run, but no Colonials were gained in this adventure. Server kept shitting itself. Ah, c'est la vie.

    ___

    TRADE - Common Market Trade

    The Directory proudly announces that it has witnessed the following goods circulated.

    Nuffen. MIA Company Citizens.

    ___

    TRADE - US MineZ Trade

    2 Gunpowder

    1 Diamond Sword

    1 Golden Apple

    1 Sugar

    2 Flash Grenades

    in exchange for

    2 Bags

    2 Infinity Bows

    Ameeriiicaaaaaa

    Ameriicaaaaaaa

    ___

    PvP Drill 189th Mass PvP Event - PvE Line Mentality

    Any moment now... We'll break out of it... Any moment.

    ___

    DOMESTIC - INSPECTION AND REPORTS OF UTC READINESS POST PVE-LINE

    Reports and inspection of elements in the UNKNOWN [?] Trading Company in all and sectors regiments have been found to be grossly sub-par in standards. When said "At least so far we're one of the most active...", it was waived off as just being "busy idiots".

    Many things were found to be quite obsolete, at least in Irishkaiser's perspective and need immediate updates and revisions. It is noted however that this is compounded from the fast paced changes in the game with new features both mechanically and topographically. Many legendaries have and are currently being revised, and with few field experience to study as the clan is geared for production and distribution in the South, cannot sustain.

    The political landscape has changed as well with many clans and groups preferring smaller consortiums than before, leaving the UNKNOWN [?] Trading Company as one of the "big" clans technically, assuming you count the Regimentals. Biggest if you count the Company Citizens as well.

    The servers are shit though, as they've always been... Which means at least we can rely on the lag to provide "certain" members and in-field advantage since they're already lagging anyway kek.

    ___

    DOMESTIC - GIVEAWAY CHOCOLATES ARRIVE TO BANJO WEEK PARTICIPANTS

    The winners of the first actual give-away has received his prize, a pair of Lorenzo Farm Cacao Truffles!. The arrival of the package marks a point wherein we are able to deal in real goods and services now. Thanks to the Clan Bank, we have eventually flung ourselves and our machines, into interplanetary space.

    This is the pride of the clan, the pride of the Company. To progress, to grow, to innovate, to think outside the box and to make the impossible happen.

    We are the only clan that can reward our members and our community in real life with real tangible goods. Be it a box of chocolate, clothing, or maybe in the future... Aftermarket Firearm parts.

    ONWARD TO THE EDGE

    ___

    DOMESTIC - IRISHKAISER SHOWCASES MODEL OF UTC CAMPAIGN DRESS c.2016

    Last week, Irishkaiser released photos of a fully made Campaign Dress. Here's one for the ladies

    Anyway, something something yadda yadda. The shit's not yet fully ready for export.

    ___

    FINANCE - 100 PITH HELMETS. SOME TO BE SOLD ONLINE. REST TO GOVERNMENT?

    Did you know that pith helmets are actually Filipino in origin? Well, to be fair - Spanish-Filipino.

    **ORDERS:**

    1) TRADE MISSION IN ROMERO NEXT WEEK.

    ___

    ^(THE [?] EMPIRE,THE COMPANY'S OFFICIAL NEWS SOURCE AND PROPAGANDA TOOL. AW YEAH)