^(HEADLINES)

    ^(EDITORIAL)

    ^(TRADE)

    ^(DRILLS)

    ^(DOMESTIC)

    ^(FINANCE)

    ^(ORDERS)

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    HEADLINES: COMPANY CITIZEN FOUND! RESCUE TEAMS REJOICE

    ASPERMONT, WESTERLANDS - A missing Company Citizen has finally been found after weeks of absence, which leaves just one citizen left to recover. After encountering him, he later stated that he just had to go and settle in college so he wouldn't have as much time as he used to.

    Our Empire and Commonwealth is richer to retain gifted individuals with talents and skills that are rejected by other groups and communities. ONLY ONE GUY LEFT... But he probably joined el Ejercito or some shit. Least that's what it was like last time. hope he'll make it for Christmas.

    If you're reading this, you know who you are: hope you can make it for Christmas.

    Oh also the Diamond Sword reward was never claimed cause UTC found him ourselves and therefore we'd technically be just paying ourselves.

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    EDITORIAL - The Growing Grand and Global Alliance  

    Irishkaiser - As many of our members in the Company Proper, Empire and Commonwealth grow older so do their skills, networks, wealth and opportunities. Most of our members have actually been doing pretty well for this year, especially the Company Veterans who served the clan.

    We now have members of stable families, of landed property and of refined education and skills. I have also begun to see more and more of them begin to cooperate. What was once an Asian phenomenon with the older generation of SEA and EA members, now is starting to spill over to the Western peoples and veterans.

    It's funny, because many of these veterans are some weird ass people who built fucking mortars in their backyards(THAT IS DANGEROUS. DO NOT DO THAT.) or have let's say... Less than savory backgrounds and such... Some of you are some real serious ghetto ass niggas I swear to Christ, where do we find you guys from? I think Sir Arthur Wellesley the Duke of Wellington said it best:

    "Our friends — I may say it in this room — are the very scum of the earth. People talk of their enlisting from their fine military feeling — all stuff — no such thing. Some of our men enlist from having got bastard children — some for minor offences — many more for drink; but you can hardly conceive such a set brought together, and it really is wonderful that we should have made them the fine fellows they are."

    As I see more of you grow and blossom, I am proud of the fine service you have done in the Company and of most of your general character after it. Some of you made fun for your lack of intelligence, masks a huge depth of emotional and logical maturity. The veterans that stayed through it all got a military education and outlook on life without having been in actual battle. Good show, my boys.

    COURSE, MOST OF YOU. SOME OF YOU ARE STILL THE VERY SCUM OF THE EARTH. TUT TUT ROYT YEAH OI.

    Maybe we'll do more business in the not too distant future.

    ___

    TRADE - US MineZ Trade Mission

    The proudly Directory reports that it has delivered

    2 iron sets

    3 diamond swords

    7 gunpowder

    in exchange for

    *19 snowballs. *

    A basic, easy Trade Mission. THE GOOD NEWS IS WE FOUND MISSING HUWITE BOI. He later apologized for being obnoxious, even though we just found him again.

    Typical.

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    TRADE - Common Market Trade

    The Directory proudly announces that it has delivered

    Bag

    Milk

    Some dyes for the road

    CANADIAN BAGGED MILK. BAGGED. MILK.

    ___

    PvP Drill 191st Mass PvP Event - Back to sleep.

    I tell ya, we've gotten super lazy... But this is what I fought for... Zzz...

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    DOMESTIC - 50% OFF ON TSOKOLATE

    In anticipation for the Holiday Season, UNKC.COMPANY.SITE has set the shipping price of its hot chocolate product down by 50%.

    Get some, you pricks. Oozah.

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    DOMESTIC - DAYLIGHT SAVINGS ALMOST CAUSED CONFUSION

    Daylight Savings revert for certain countries as nights become longer and it is the beginning of FALL-AUTUMN. This almost put the Trade Mission off by chronological mistake until the correction.

    The general rule however is to put it in the exact sovereign time of the place mentioned such as Eastern US Standard Time.

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    DOMESTIC - POPULATIONS BACK TO NORMAL. FALSE ALARM.

    It seemed to just be an anomaly that last week, PREMIUMS began to reach 50% of the server population. That was scary as fuck, though. But it'll probably just become more and more common.

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    FINANCE - SHIPMENT DELAYED

    You know, I thought it'd be a bit more exciting but it turns out to be a lot of waiting

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    FINANCE - CLAN BANK ALWAYS RIGHT.

    The IPO offered to the Bank of the Unknown [?] Clan last week was finally released, and the results were fucking hilarious lol

    BANK OF THE UNKNOWN [?] CLAN IS ALWAYS RIGHT.

    **ORDERS:**

    1) TRADE MISSION NEXT WEEK

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